Thursday, March 8 - Cage Match (North Coast vs. Death By Roo Roo)

I wasn’t sure whether or not I wanted to write about last night’s cage match or not due to what I imagine might be perceived blow back. But then I remembered, the blog is titled improv observations, and i’d be remiss not to write since I made a few last night. You don’t have to agree with me on the issue, I don’t think that’s why I write this but here are my thoughts on the matter: Musical/gimmick based improv vs. regular improv.

Let me preface this by saying, I enjoy several members of North Coast as improvisers, I’ve seen them work and occasionally, I’ve gotten to play with some of them. Boris and James? Some of the funniest guys out there. So please, don’t make this some sort of blog-hate-crime. That isn’t what this is.

Death By Roo Roo is one of the first teams I started seeing regularly before I even began taking classes at UCB. They’re easily my favorite team. They have that balance—steady straight men, game machines and fucking wildcards. They are legendary. They are epic—look up the stats, talk to someone, everyone knows it.

I’m not even going to sit here and tell you that Roo Roo had an AMAZING set last night. They didn’t. BUT they were funny and sound improv happened. There was heightening—damn near immediately. There were patterns. There was justification—lot’s of it in fact. I’d like to see you try and work a lady drinking a cup of cum into your next scene and try NOT to justify it. The funny was in the justification last night.

The fact that Anthony could throw out all these crazy ideas and sit there and watch Gavin and Neil have to justify it all. And I mean the set was crazy. At one point, Anthony really wanted a sandwich to come out of Gemberling’s head, so after working on the logistics of it being a pita and not technically a sandwich, food was produced from his head. Was it insane? Yes. But everything I need to learn about improv—the mechanics of it, and everything I like about improv happened in that monoscene.

Conversely, North Coast didn’t have a GREAT set either. If you’ve seen North Coast enough, and I’ve seen North Coast enough to know they weren’t as crisp or as sharp as they have been in past performances. There were a few times when the beatboxer just edited the scene doing the explosion sound before it even got off the ground. The improv? A bit joke-y for my taste. There were a couple of moments where it seemed clunky—scene work/object work people walking through doors of bathrooms and/or into bathroom sinks. A couple of scenes just didn’t work—Carnival—taxes? I was lost. Before long, I looked at the clock with seven or eight minutes left and it just seemed like they ran out of steam. Ran out of good rhymes. That’s  my take on it. It’s a very unique thing…to rap improv, outside of North Coast, I know Patrick Noth does it and he does it on his own.

BUT it’s rap right? It’s making rhymes and that’s infinitely more impressive than just saying words and making connections? Yes? If it’s fucking ON POINT and if there’s no way I can leave that theatre not thinking, my mind wasn’t blown, I think so. Because it’s such a unique thing. The first time I saw North Coast was at a Tesla show. I genuinely left there thinking something incredible had happened and it had. Last night, I just didn’t have the same feeling.

And that’s when it dawned on me. You can have a mediocre musical/gimmick improv set and win, with a crowd but the same is not true of a regular improv set. You have to be exceptional—and even then, the crowd must be in your favor. Two weeks ago Fuck That Shit did something pretty impressive and still lost by 24 votes. I make no bones about saying i was genuinely shocked.

After last night, i’ve realized, an improv team can never match a musical improv team head to head and prevail by just doing improv. It sounds crazy. I just typed that and I know it’s crazy but it’s true. I’ve seen it enough to know it. You need an approach.

Last week, I heard Mr. Crime did six harolds in 20 minutes. That’s fucking impressive. I didn’t see it so I don’t know if those harolds were any good or if they weren’t. But they had the right idea. If you think you’re going to go to cage match and your improv—even on your BEST day (re: Fuck That Shit) is going to stand a chance against people rapping, you’ve got another thing coming.

Another realization, crowd factor of late has been suspect. I don’t think that audience has been stacked in favor of one team or another since the days of Dog Court. I think last night’s battle came down to 12 votes, let that sink in. 12 votes. If you don’t want to be that person scratching your head because you didn’t see it or had no idea what happened, show up! See what the hell is happening first hand. Make your own decision, vote for who you want! But don’t be that guy or girl who goes, “OH MY GOD, _______ won? I wouldn’t have….” Fucking take some stock in yourself as an improviser and see the show. It’s free for students and performers, $5 for everyone else.

Last realization, musical improv is not good to Roo Roo. Two years running, they’ve been eliminated from cage match with a musical situation. Remember how Captcha dropped the musical bomb last year and then won by four votes or something insanely close like that? Yeah.

Well that’s it. I’ve said what i’ve said. You decide what’s happening at cage match, quite literally. See North Coast go head to head with harold vets, Very Good Kiss next week Thursday, 11pm, UCB Chelsea.

Tuesday, February 14th - Harold Night (Grandma’s Ashes)

I’ve been meaning to write about Grandma’s Ashes for awhile now, just turns out, their Valentine’s Day Harold was blown out of the water, making for a pretty easy pick this week.

What can I say about Grandma’s Ashes that you don’t already know? They are super supportive of one another’s ideas and heighten to the max. After hearing Chris Gethard speak about the value and importance of slow-cooking an improv scene, I can comfortably say, Grandma’s Ashes does this AT LEAST once a show. Maybe a group game, maybe a scene where all the members walk on or tag out to establish the world but it’s true, it’s incredibly rewarding (as an audience member), to see the pay off of everyone slowly heightening some idea or concept.

Alright, i’ll get on with it.

Suggestion: Carp.

1A - BSJ initiates with Morgan as a son who needs to talk to his dad about something. His commitment to playing some angsty teenager is ridiculous, but this is BSJ and its what he does best. He basically reveals that he got a boner for his teacher Mrs. Petrinko. Slowly, we learn that Mrs. Petrinko is an elderly, haggard woman who BSJ’s character shouldn’t normally be attracted to. In a bid to heighten, Morgan introduces Cosmo magazine (not playboy as you might suspect) in an attempt to show BSJ what sort of girls he should be into. BSJ admits that he finds Mrs. Petrenko’s walker sexy, that’s the sort of thing he’s into.

1B - Josh and Winston open as a couple about to have their first kiss. Josh has fish lips and no idea how to kiss, just moving in with his mouth awkwardly agape to Winston, who’s playing it completely straight. The game quickly becomes that Josh is just bad/incredibly awkward in intimate/romantic situations. As Josh’s character attempts to “soothe” Winston, he basically just winds up embracing/rubbing his face really hard. He moves around to sort of hug Winston in a cute manner but just winds up choking the shit out Winston’s midsection. Just picture Lenny from Of Mice and Men on a date, imagine how that might go. Ryan came on as a movie theater janitor who wanted to make sure everything was copacetic. The funniest thing about this scene was Winston’s justifications. We’re taught in class to play things real, and I think 90% of us would find a way to nudge out of a romantic situation if it seemed absolutely AWKWARD, unless of course, there’s an actual reason for your staying-the person is awesome, is a billionaire, you don’t want to hurt their feelings, whatever…you get it. It’s more believable.

1C - Dru initiates the scene with the sentence, “We got Carp here” it’s an a thick Mass. accent though as he explains what seems to be the specials of the day to Winston who is sitting next to an empty seat. Lydia walks on semi-flushed, apologizing for being late as Winston explains that he always makes her park the car. Dru’s accent gets progressively thicker and less clear the more angry he gets at this couple. Abra walks on as a waitress, apologizing for being late (GREAT) heightening to state that, “the carp is served with corn on the cob and caramelized…” you get the point, in an even THICKER Mass. accent, it’s fucking hysterical. Dru comes back to ask if the couple drives a Saab—in his accent, you understand what’s happening, as he gets more infuriated, Abra takes over and literally starts to read the license plate number off before the edit comes. So fun to watch.

Group #1 - Fan boats. Who the fuck is Ryan Karels and where do these characters emerge from within his being? Karels played the sort of captain of a swamp love tour fan boat enterprise. BSJ and Lydia (?), were on board as the love couple. Dru and Abra were playing the actual fan. Josh walked on as a gator that got to climb aboard and get kissed by BSJ. It was great. It was also a reminder that group games don’t need to start with the traditional, “ALRIGHT Walmart executives, get in here to solve BLANK problem”. It’s also refreshing to see players content with just being active. Dru didn’t necessarily speak a word in the scene but his commitment to being the best fan blade at the back of the boat was worthwhile.

2A - Josh initiates as Mrs. Petrinko teaching a sex ed class. Another scene ripe with great specifics. Josh gets into a bit of the sex education and then yields to the class who are all attempting to hide their boners. Josh continues to just interact in the world as that alone seems to illicit a reaction from the class. He adds a few character revelations—a former UCLA volleyball player, sexy sport for stocky, tall women, which eventually triggers Teddy’s (BSJ) orgasm as verbalized by Lydia, “Teddy seems fine, even sleepy…” EDIT.

2B - Josh and Winston are on a date…well at first, with two guys sitting on chairs facing front, you’re inclined to think that but thanks to a walk on, we learn that they’re at Best Buy, sitting on a couch watching Driving Ms. Daisy. Josh is just pounding on Winston’s titties. The only reason he’s sitting there and taking it is that Josh is so nice, he couldn’t possibly be without him. Abra’s walk on established the location and she endowed herself as a weird best buy sales clerk who just had to watch everything going. Lydia then came on as her supervisor to double-check she was watching everything. Just to round out the environment, BSJ and Morgan walk on as a couple genuinely interested in buying a TV and a have a mini-discourse about whether or not the TV is big enough, too big etc. Just the way normal people do. The scene ended with a weird jerk off sitch and the manager asking if Abra’s character was getting all of it.

2C - Dru Johnson is playing the eastern Mass. character, only this time, he’s a karaoke DJ. This is fucking great. BSJ steps to the mike and does everything you’ve SEEN (or personally) done at a Karaoke bar. He’s up there, doing the stare, the shake, the dart off to get a sip of your drink because the music still hasn’t started, all of those things are happening. But Dru is calling out, in that strong accent, “16 more bars…5 more bars…” to let BSJ make all these moves…Finally, when BSJ does decide to speak he doesn’t lame out with some BS, he goes for it, and in his own eastern Mass. accent, starts the opening lines of Spice Girls’ Wannabe, it was fucking perfect.

Group #2 - Ryan initiates as this super sinister dinner host, welcoming everyone for coming to his estate for a dinner in which everything being served has been killed by him. We start really small with the celery and carrots which he blanched. The guests are playing along and giving Ryan more to play with by doing things like asking for his secret to the killer ranch dressing (Ryan creepily responding, you’re more right than you know). I think Josh came out to be a creepy butler, but someone in the room gifted that he was Ryan’s wife and he just accepted it without a rebuttal or anything! They moved on to the salad—someone throws out the specific that both romaine and iceberg are visible and Ryan, sinisterly, adds that lurking below is the sinister blue cheese, I can watch this all night. Ryan being creepily sinister over food and other items is a fucking treat people.

Now i’m sure staying with the food game would have been acceptable but BSJ establishes a move to rest it and used the environment to make a different one, asking about Ryan’s grandfather clock and where he got it. Of course he didn’t buy it, he murdered a 40 year old oak tree which he chopped down mercilessly after it had been struck by lightening to fashion it!

We finally reach the main course and Ryan is mentioning that once they get there there is no going back. In his best Hannibal Lecter, asks the guests if they know what he hears at night? I hear cuckoos, before adding that huevos rancheros will indeed be served. (Cue massive applause).

3B/group1 - Is two eastern Mass. ladies attempting to parallel park in one parking space before the gator walks on for the blackout.

What did I learn from Grandma’s Ashes?

• Commit. Even if you’re being the weird one on stage, just stick to your choice and play it. Know that your scene partners will help straight-man and justify if you’re getting too weird.
• Go hard. Just leave it all on stage. Once your harold/performance is done, that’s it. So why hold back? Why be reserved? I respect G-Ashes for consistently pushing it to the limit.
• Patience goes a long way. I just heard Gethard speak to this effect, the delight in seeing that Hannibal dinner party scene
• Be more like Abra Tabak. She’s always supportive and FULL of characters. We’ve all seen characters go wrong, it’s like a misfit on stage when you see someone doing something they shouldn’t be doing because it’s not believable. ONLY, with Abra, really, it’s always believable. She’s highly adaptable. It’s really impressive.

Check for Grandma’s Ashes on Tuesdays at UCB. Tomorrow (Feb. 21st) they’re up fourth. Also be on the lookout for their rotating weekend slot (when available), Grandma’s Ashes Gets Dark!!

Tuesday, January 24th - Harold Night (Mr. Crime)

I saw the first three harolds on Tuesday night but I’ve decided to edit the way I approach my note process (and as a result, this blog). Writing about multiple harolds at once can be pretty daunting, and lengthy (for everyone), so I’d rather break them down one at a time. Occasionally, I’ll pick my favorite, or at other times, the ones I think I learned the most from or appreciated most.

That said, This week i’ve picked Mr. Crime. Creature gets a hearty nod though.

Mr. Crime.
Suggestion: Romance.

After generating a slew of hilarious comedic premises in their opening, who the hell knew where Mr. Crime would go with this one? They went somewhere funny…immediately. Which I think set the bar for the rest of their set. They’re always so engaged with one another and supportive. They frequently step forward in each others’ beats to help grow the world and provide additional moves. Their backline is pretty solid.

Higbie and Karin played an author and an editor/book publisher in the first beat. The main problem was that since striking it big with his first novel—Higbie’s character hadn’t been able to recreate the genius that once was as a result of his process getting in the way. His process? Locking himself away in his attic without food until the novel is complete. As you might expect, this created several problems. The game was found almost immediately.

I love watching Karin improvise because I think she’s a great listener. Each line Higbie delivered she accepted, yes and-ed and heightened, and all fairly simply without excessive use of dialog. Higbie alluded to his first novel’s success—she accepted it, adding that “the Chocolate River” was indeed a best-seller. He said his second book didn’t fair so well. Again, she accepted it, keeping the game going by remarking that, “Banana Nut City” didn’t hit the numbers they’d hoped for. Finally, she got the edit by handing him back his most recent effort, and asking that he figure his writing process out while revising, “I’ll Eat Anything”. So fun.

In the second scene. KRISTEN (sorry!) and Riley played an athlete and a coach. I don’t know if that’s the reaction Riley was going for when he said, “Now son, sit down we need to talk about this” but it’s improv and in some instances, you’ve got to go with the flow once your scene partner adds to the reality. Kristen quickly established Riley as an overbearing coach way too concerned with his players’ sexual development/activity, that was his gift and he played it. It literally could have changed the whole dynamic of the scene had he forced himself into being the dad—or whatever he initially had in mind.

The third scene featured Alexis and Amos, personal favorites of mine—don’t think so? Watch their faces next time they improvise, so engaging, always so animated. Alexis was a tourist and Amos was some Italian figure going on about the romantic language and why he’d never sleep with Americans. It wasn’t immediately clear what sex he was and no one labeled it at the top UNTIL Zach stepped forward to state that this was the “Legend of Don Juan Digorno” at which point Amos realized what had happened. Wanting to remain a woman—he justified it immediately, accepting the legend that his character was the famed temptress of Italy who turned so many men down that they named her after one. At which point it was abundantly clear Amos was a lady. A peculiar edit happened next as Noth came forward to state that the play of Don Juan Digorno would continue in the next beat. It worked though.

Mr. Crime are notorious fourth-wall breakers in group games. They do it alllll the time! In their first group game they played eight sexy detectives who fucked criminals. That was it, that was all that was necessary.

The second beat of the the first scene was short and sweet. I’ve gotten the improv note, “let’s see that, show it, don’t talk about it” so I was quite pleased that Higbie initiated as the author doing his rewrite. The backline jumped on board so quickly after his initiation line which was, “Don’t think about food” while someone played his brain, speaking to himself about wanting food. Someone then became his typewriter encouraging him to eat it. Which are all fun game moves. Eventually, Riley walked on as a landlord (heightening), and also became an appetizing treat for Higbie’s character to make a pass at. Solid stuff.

In the second beat of the coach/horny athlete scene, Mr. Crime expanded the world to an entire team of baseball players who apparently hadn’t jerked off in quite some time because of their overbearing coach. I don’t know how anyone plays baseball with two mitts on but the scene was less about the act of playing the game and more about the act of trying to bring yourself to completion utilizing any means necessary. Baseballs, your teammate’s body, glove, whatever. Everything was fair game.

When we picked back up with the Legend of Juan Digiorno a new character—Penelope is trying to out Juan as being some sort of southerner and implying that the accent is in some way less Italian? I don’t know. It didn’t matter because the scene was about the American who only minutes before (really quick time dash), had been trying to sleep with Juan but had taken up with Penelope who hosted American study abroad students. It was quickly revealed that this was a classic misdirect scene which really dealt with Alexis’ character—the shape-shifting American traveler. Edit.

Second group game is fun. Riley receives a text message “P-P-P” which Zach clarifies means, please pound penis; they send one back. Karin and Amos step out across stage to receive said text, “R-F-N” Ready for Nigthtime? No. Regional Fair Now, clarifies Amos. Higbie gets involved received a string of texts, “LMNO” and “PQRS” which just turn out to be a portion of the alphabet. The whole thing is resolved when Riley decides to just call Karin and figure out what they’re both talking about. Karin plays a nervous teenager well, edits on the nervous laughter.

Mr. Crime made a few connections early but the scene that got the most attention led to the eventual black out was those fucking cops. No literally, the cops wanted to fuck, so they started killing each other one by one just to get fucked. Things of note, Zach gives one hell of an improv blow job. Someone connected the cops fucking to the baseball game and ZACH—the busy man that he was, then made the pitcher the Italian Temptress—Delivery from Digorno…blackout. 

Things I learned:

• Have fun/listen with one another (pretty obvious)
• Yes and-ing doesn’t have to feel forced or clunky
• When walking on/tagging out, have a specific point and make it sooner rather than later, this enables others to quickly come on and support/heighten the game (re: Higbie typewriter scene)

That’s all for now.

Saturday, Jan. 21 - The Lady Jam

Shannon O’Neill is one of my imrpov, scratch that, life heroes. The fact that she created the Lady Jam is just one of the many testaments why.

If you weren’t at the inaugural Lady Jam on Saturday, you missed a real treat. I’ve run into several women since then who had already heard how amazing it was and they’ve already expressed how were sad they were to have missed it. If you’re one of them, don’t worry! The Lady Jam returns on Friday, February 24th at Midnight, so put it in your icals and set a bloody reminder already, you don’t want to miss it (again)! I also challenge you to bring a friend with you when you come, cause you’re going to want to come.

If you weren’t there, what exactly did you miss? A whole lot of funny ladies improvising and several dance intermissions. If you haven’t yet exhausted your lung capacity jumping around dancing before an improv set, I encourage you to try it, I was JACKED UP and ready to improvise. I wasn’t nervous, I was just really excited to play with a bunch women (don’t be a fucker and read that weird). 

The Lady Jam, if you’re still unfamiliar, is a jam Shannon created strictly for the ladies. Each month she’ll enlist a group of UCB performers to help her host. Saturday’s cast included Chelsea Clarke, Abra Tabak, Fran Gillespie, Kate Riley, Lydia Hensler and Morgan Jarrett—who were all amazing. There were also other veteran improvisers and performers from the theater on hand to just jam it up as well—Sasheer Zamata and Nicole Byer both came out, as did Veronica Osario and Silvija Ozols. (If I’ve missed anyone, I apologize, I got drunk for the first time in three weeks so my memory is slightly foggy, days later).

Like any jam, you get to put your name on a list and perform with peers and vets for 10 minutes. Things i immediately noticed, people were unafraid to initiate whatever they had in mind or support something that an improviser thought couldn’t be done. At one point Chelsea was afraid she couldn’t do a roll—seems silly but there were two ladies right at her side helping her along. I don’t want to speak for everyone, but I personally felt there was a higher level of comfort and support than I’m used to feeling at jams (if that makes sense). There was next to no hesitation, and no one shat on each other. It was great. Honestly, I don’t think I saw a single back line frown or anyone who didn’t look like they were having a fantastic time. There was next to no nay-saying—if any at all! There was also lots of justification. LOTS of justification. Did I mention, I got to improvise with Silvija?? Okay. Well I just did. And it’s something you can do too if you come out to the show.

Lastly, if you have a dick and you’re reading this post, don’t worry. You’re allowed to come to the lady jam and show support—I think you should come in fact, because you’ll really like it. You just can’t scream any weird sexist crap while the performance is going on (not that that ever happens during an improv set). Shout outs to Marshall Stratton, Fesh, Austin Rye and a few other gents who were brave enough to attend.

Till next time kids.

Harold Night - 1/3/12

I’ve been slacking or there aren’t enough hours in the day. In any event, I hope to rectify that tonight.

Mr. Crime.
Suggestion: Reversal. (Sound & motion)
I’ll start by saying Mr. Crime has stepped it’s game up. All these guys are funny individually and are each on some pretty hysterical indie teams, but as a unit, they are clicking…at least the last few harolds i’ve seen them in. It always looks like they’re having fun and supporting one another. So kudos to Mr. Crime.

In the first scene, Alexis/Karin are playing Chess. The game is labeled in .5 seconds and it’s going to be Alexis stating obvious truths about the game and their interaction. I love the analogous jump in the second beat, because it puts us in a James Bond universe where Karin is Bond and Alexis is the evil nemesis who just says everything he’s going to do. Some fun walk ons with Kristen as a hot bond girl. Someone (Zach maybe?) Came on as an obvious henchman.  

Amos/Zach are a player and coach for a basketball team in the second scene. Amos is playing for the other team because he’s not sure his transfer has gone through. I initially thought this was a mislabeling game, where Amos kept on naming the wrong person he should have seen…Coach—Chancellor—Registrar etc. I think I’m wrong. In the second beat, Amos has made it all the way to the championship game where he will represent both teams in a custom made uniform for both teams. Funny thing here, not everyone in Mr. Crime knows the rules of basketball but they all did a good job of going with the flow and supporting one another. Jump balls. Calling time outs. It all seemed foreign but somehow familiar because they were going through the motions. Somewhat tying into Will Hines’ Know Everything post, no one ACTED like they didn’t know what was going on. So it went over quite well. Zach Willis is a funny man.

Finally in the third scene, Kristen/Patrick are backing up what turns out to be a garbage truck. They runover/bump into some speed walkers and we quickly discover there’s some sort of ongoing feud happening. Following a quick bout of heightening, the speedwalkers overpower the garbage men for their truck, chase them down and kill them. What I loved most about this scene was the commitment to the physicality and the space. When Alexis and Zach jumped on the back of the truck, they shuffled along the stage as if they were actually on the back of a truck. That really stood out to me. BELIEVABLE shit. I know I get sloppy with the physicality of my world or environment, it was nice to see them fill that in.

The speed walkers are back in the second beat and they’re still attacking garbage men but they’ve expanded their assault to take on ice cream men and postal workers. Riley said one of the funniest things of the show, remarking on how things had escalated to this point…”ya, know, I joined this (speed walking) group because I wanted to keep my cholesterol down and lose weight but you get in one tiff with a sanitation worker, and next thing ya know, you’re running them over…” something to that effect. Which summed up how they’d gotten too far deep and over what? 

1st Group Game - Switcheroos. Someone labels this early enough, “people will believe anything doctors say.” So if your doctor hands you a pair of cooked ducks on a plate, and tells you they are the twins you just gave birth to, you’ll believe it. Conversely, that same doctor might turn up at a pond with a pair of twins for a couple of ducks. You get it. It worked.

2nd Group Game - “Flipped it on me”
Noth initiates as a guy in an interrogation room laughing in disbelief because some other criminal caught him off guard. Karin—one of the interrogators is rolling with laughter and slowly Zach starts laughing, yes and-ing and simultaneously raising the stakes, he adds a little caveat…”yeah i get it, anyway, a baby was shot.” Hilarious! Who doesn’t want to laugh at a baby getting shot in an accidental gunfight? Well Riley makes a solid walk on as the parent of said dead baby, and plays it real enough. As soon as he hears the story, he explodes with laughter. Brilliant.

Mr. Crime is a young team but they’ve grown. They’re doing their thing. I don’t know if they changed coaches or what, but i’m liking what they’re up to.

Deckard.
Suggestion: Flannel (albeit with some disgruntled audience members). (Pattern game)
Remember how once upon a time Deckard didn’t do an opening? Well fucking forget it! They did a pattern game. And that shit was pretty tight and why wouldn’t it be? In a group where Jackie Jennings, James Dwyer and Benjamin Apple exist? Come on. Funny stuff.

Murph and Pat. Murph doesn’t trust the clothes he’s wearing. It’s because he shops at a department  store where some creep (Tom) basically says anything to offload the merchandise while Murph is blindly trusting of said department store salesman.

Starr and Dwyer. I’ll never get tired of seeing pedophile scenes in improv and I surely hope James takes this as a complement, but he plays one to the T. Starr is on some sort of covert mission to identify which christmas card James would like better: one with a puppy orrrr one with a naked girl in a basement? Duh. The second beat features Apple/Dwyer playing a game of would you rather, the options posed are rub your dick on a kid’s shin or whatever a normal option for this game might be. Needless to say it was a swift edit and super tight second beat.

Apple and Kareman. Fucking funny scene. Grade school reunion whilst shopping at pathmark. Apple wants to know if Kareman still smokes weed, as an unemployed blogger who still lives at home, the answer is an emphatic yes. Jackie has an amazing walk-on as Shelly, another cohort from grade school who now works at Pathmark. She too still smokes that, ‘green-green’.

Group game 1: The horseshoe starts off trying to guess a game, a bit of confusion about charades vs. taboo but Apple labels the game a party which will never get off the ground if its attendees can’t settle on a board game to play. Everyone starts introducing their own game—wits and wagers, hopscotch, apples and apples etc. Things get a bit insane when everyone tries to play their games simultaneously.

Group game 2: A bunch of arsehole grandchildren have a list of terrible demands for their grandmother. When it nearly got off track, Dwyer put the game back on track reminding everyone they weren’t there to abuse their grandmother but instead, set her straight. Tom makes a nice connection when someone mentions that they’re tired of getting shitty slippers for christmas—he tags in as the same shitty/sinister salesman pushing items on people—in this instance, slippers to the grandmother.

Last thing i’ve got notes on is the pedophile party. James just asking everyone how they know and if they’d just keep a lid on it because these things shouldn’t get out. It’s obviously yet another sting operation to get him to admit he diddles children, he catches on and storms off.

I love Deckard because they’ve got a ton of smart, smart improvisers. Some of the moves Ben Apple/Matt Starr and George Kareman make are beyond me. They aren’t telepathic.

Creature.
Suggestion: Antenna. (Invocation).
Cory and JD play a game where despite Cory’s many attempts to get his dad to love him, he doesn’t give a crap unless its related to the Price is Right. The guy loves game shows/Bob Barker more than he loves his own son, who’s a successful football player. In the second beat, JD is dead—he’s a ghost and his son is on the verge of playing in the super bowl. JD only has five minutes and instead of talking/catching up with his son, he’d rather watch Drew Carey host the Price is Right. Cory has a super funny line, “Can’t you get an extension, dad? I’m playing in the super bowl” perhaps it was the deadpan delivery. Cory’s good at that. In the third beat, Cory’s being inducted into the Hall of Fame, Ryan initiates next to JD as ghosts looking down in heaven and nudges JD like he should be there…somehow it becomes the Sportsman of the Year award and someone asks where his dad is, prompting the blackout.

Ken and Sam are trapped in a bunker. He’s rather abusive to Sam but she stays there and takes it. They are surrounded by nothing but cans. I’m not sure what else to say, except that Ken’s character is fucking crazy. In the second beat, we learn that Ken is doing something with PVC pipe. Sam who’s been waiting for her mother, learns she won’t be coming because, Ken, “made her go away”. Turns out he stuffed her in a can? Sure.

Alison Rich is amazing, she’s such a charming improviser. I don’t know how else to say it, except, she plays believable characters. She initiated as some chimney sweep kid from Liverpool just tying to make it in NYC. Despite the fact she was of legal age she wanted nothing more than to be adopted. Kolsky and Williams played these amazing parents who saw no reason why they shouldn’t accept this person in their lives, with a son away at college, they had space. Steve turns up as Rich’s brother? This gets super fun in the second beat because Kolsky and Williams have absolutely fallen in love at the prospect of having a full nest again, so whatever Rich says, goes. Only now, Ken has walked on as the brother home from college. If Rich say’s today’s christmas, then it is, if Steve say’s it’s Easter, then it is! Ken just gets the shaft and is told to go get lights and make himself useful.

1st group game: Super weird. Overly specific about a scarecrow needed for a corporate farm. Someone ends up dead because ???

2nd group game: Zombie apocalypse/social issues. My notes are mostly indecipherable with the exception of Ken’s walk on as a zombie at the genius bar…he’s trying to say something and his jaw falls off. That was so bloody funny. Because it happens…i watch Walking Dead!

Grandma’s Ashes.
I didn’t take notes but I thought I should mention that they CRUSHED this harold. With a suggestion like Rival Secretaries, you’d imagine so but it was so rich, the opening was full of so many options. This was Megan Neuringer’s last Harold with the team and they absolutely blew it out of the park. I’m not trying to exaggerate, but every scene, every walk on, EVERYTHING hit. I can only dream of being as good as anyone on this team. Also, I’ll miss Megan Neuringer.

Sunday, Jan. 1 - Secret Asssscat Show/Jam

As an improv nerd, I don’t think I could’ve asked for a better start to my new  year than being at the UCB last night. As we all shook away the cobwebs and the haze of partying way too hard to ring in the New Year, we slowly arrived at the theater for some sort of secret show. There hadn’t been much talk prior, I myself knew not of what was to come but sensed it wasn’t something I would want to miss. I’m glad I didn’t. 

After a brief discourse about the previous evening’s activities with some of the people I was seated around, “Don’t stop till you get enough” by Michael Jackson came on. The house lights went down, then came up. And before I knew it, Amy Poehler was standing on stage welcoming us to the New Year! I was stunned—understatement of the year—still early, I know. One by one, she welcomed the night’s performers to the stage…Zach Woods, Mike O’Brien, Chris Gethard, Fran Gillespie, Neil Casey, Brandon Gardner, Shannon O’Neill…later joined by Gavin Speiller. It was magical.

They did an Asssscat set—roughly 45 minutes long with three monologues told by members of the audience, including Andy Beckerman, Connor Ratliff and Riley Soloner—all great. All told honest stories and inspired fun scenes. The whole thing was surreal. My only regret is not taking a picture but it isn’t something i’ll be forgetting any time soon, or ever. The support in the room was insane. You might think i’m being silly, but you could truly sense it, and we all sat there on pins and needles waiting for what came next. I think based on my experience, and those I caught up with afterwards, we were glad to have been there and extremely fortunate we went. It easily became one of my favorite UCB memories. 

My favorite scenes from the Asssscat set included:

• Free masons. It was clear that only a few people knew what the Free Masons actually did—the most knowledgeable being Gethard. But, as we all know, with justification, in improv, anything is possible. And so with that, the Free Masons put misinformation out to the world but in reality, they just stand around counting numbers and repeating their name.
• I fell down the stairs. The biggest secret in this school was the fact that Neil Casey fell downstairs, or had purported himself as having done so. We saw a nice tag out run of people who were either pleased, displeased, envious or turned on by this revelation. A call-back later in the night featured Neil actually falling down stairs. The physicality of Neil dropping down flight after flight on stage was in-fucking-sanely funny.
  
  
• Peel Out. Fran selling cars, or rather, not selling them because she encourages potential car buyers to peel out, directly into a concrete wall. The scene escalates when Casey enters as a man—who in Arizona, does not own a car and is excited for a first time buyer. Reluctant to peel out, he just slowly crashes into the concrete wall. 
  
  
• Teacher/Confession. Poehler initiated as a principal and O’Brien was the student. She asked if he knew why he was in her office. The obvious choice was his misconduct/misbehavior in school but he started over-sharing things he had done earlier in the week—mostly dealing with masturbation. His real crime was that he was repeatedly slapping his teacher in the face because she had a smart mouth. Funniest move was Fran tagging in with Amy to ask why he hadn’t been suspended, her emotion in the scene was priceless and then obviously, O’Brien showing us what happens when he slaps Fran in the face.
• Group science fair/X-factor style. All the students—and one actual scientist (Z Dub) had 30 seconds to tell Poehler what their project was about, based on that information, she’d determine which two moved on, from there, vote on the winner with the students who’d already been eliminated. Fun that Zach Woods chose to find something real, the God particle and that he had voluntarily entered this children’s science fair. Again, with justification, anything is possible—he wanted to wait until he had something worthwhile so he’d convincingly win a fair before entering.

What followed next was a pretty standard jam, only instead of just playing with yourselves, you got to improvise with a few of the Asssscat performers. I speak for myself when I tell you, i’ve never felt more nervous to hear my name called for a jam before in my life. I started this new thing where I plan on not drinking for the next several weeks and it began last night. Gut-wrenching but incredibly fun. I was tucked in the last set of the night. I drank a blended frog. I got to improvise on a stage with Zach Woods and Mike O’Brien. My night was complete.

Some of my favorite scenes from the jam included:

• Secret Agents. Amy and a guy were secret agents. It was just a really organic scene and was heighten splendidly. The British accents were just a bouns. We got to see tag outs, a glass coat, and extreme gift giving. Your glass coat, it’s cutting you!
• The new word for 2012. Group games are fun. Group games are especially fun when improvisers are faced with the simple task of creating a new word, that sounds FUN and has never been heard before. Andy Rocco came up with one. It was something ridiculous. The group moved on to actual peoples’ names that no one had ever heard and we saw it played a few different ways.

• Lexicons. People existing in a space where no one knew what lexicons necessarily were, but that they kept turning up. The reason being? The man upstairs wants more lexicons!
• I loved your book…but. The man upstairs said I can’t publish it. What happens when everyone just discovers something fun to play and immediately hammers the shit out of it. Katherine Maughan was an author of a book that everyone in this publishing house had loved, however, no one could publish it because superiors on the next floor up found reasons to pass the buck further up the line. The scene ends with Casey justifying that the company couldn’t publish her because it was in fact bankrupt.
  
  
• Newscast. Amy initiated a scene doing the morning news. Her co-anchor was supposed to pass it on to the weatherman for the forecast, he basically said it was going to rain all week. This led to an upset weather man, repeatedly dropping the F-bomb for the co-anchor stealing the line. What happened next was a series of moves where the game was doing someone else’s job. Favorite moment, Poehler saying, she wasn’t quite over the F-bomb being dropped on News 13 and then Karin H. coming in to correct Amy on doing her job.
  
  
• Cheap Anniversary. Gift giving to the max. Fran and Gavin were on their anniversary. Both were just broke or cheap so they opted to go camping with minimal supplies or provisions. Hearing wolves in the background, the backline continued making sounds. Starzinski made a weird sound which Gavin established was a sick wolf unable to keep up with the back. Eventually, the backline made another weird sound. Fran said it was her empty stomach as a result of her air diet, but Gavin questioned whether or not it was a queef. You haven’t lived until you’ve seen these two discuss the dynamics of queefing on stage. 
• Spaghetti Sauce. Nathan Lin (? could have been someone else?) was a sales associate at a grocery store with a roped off area as a result of some broken spaghetti sauce. Amos came in as the guy just trying to grab some Ragu and be on his way. Nathan refused to let him buy it of course, stating that the last time he allowed some lady to cross the roped off area, she died. Naturally, Amos reaches for the sauce, dies instantly and Nathan just walks off stage. It was priceless.

I’m sure i’m missing stuff. My brain is still foggy from recent celebrations and I didn’t take notes but god, was this great. What an amazing start to the new year. Don’t stop till you get enough, indeed.

Monday, Dec. 19 - Improv Nerds

Wednesday, Dec. 14 - UCB Improv Jam hosted by Grandma’s Ashes.

If you’re looking for a fun avenue to go improvise with strangers, friendly faces and house team members, look no further! The Improv Jam at the UCB East is your destination on Wednesday nights at 11pm and it has it all.

I’ve done just about every free jam there is in the city—Improdome/Magnet Mixers mostly but there’s something really fun about the UCB Jam and it’s in large part due to the hosts. Most of the team members of Grandma’s Ashes generally attend each week, if not the greater majority of the team is present and they do a great job of getting everyone involved. Sometimes improv is daunting and stepping out with strangers can be scary but characters like Josh Patten, Brandon Scott Jones and Lydia Hensler make it safe! I’m not saying that to be cheesy but they genuinely want all the improvisers who show up to have a great experience which shows.

No one leaves the stage frowning or pouting about what they did or didn’t do, could or could have done. It’s a JAM, just improvise. If it makes any sort of sense people are happy! Perks include, guest appearances from legendary house team members…something that shouldn’t go unnoticed. Last night Neil Casey got up—he utilized a pseudonym which I found funny but that isn’t common at all the NYC jams. You don’t just get to randomly perform with the best of the best.

I remember going to Improdome jams early on and just remembering the positive takeaway being a non-stop exercise in justification because the people that went weren’t always improvisers, didn’t care about grounded scene work or were simply shit-faced. One distinct memory is this older man—someone’s dad, probably someone’s grandfather even, wanted to enter every scene and was just determined to say the word “pussy” as much as possible. On a submarine. In a Subway restaurant. He didn’t give a shit. That’s commonplace and after awhile, I found I didn’t want to go waste my time and stay out all night to get into shit scenes.

The reality that all jams are just a shit show has finally been broken! If you want a place to go explore improv or you just want to get up a little more than the amount of time in your eight-week class, go! If you don’t have to be at work early, or if you’re okay with going in late or if you’re unemployed, don’t stay home—go jam! If you love improv and want to get more scene work (so nearly everybody), go! Just show up, put your name in the bucket and let Grandma’s Ashes do the rest.

I’m not sure what the situation is with the holidays, so just make sure you check the schedule before popping over. The Jam usually takes place on Wednesday nights at 11pm. UCB East.

Wednesday, Nov. 30 - Two Man Movie

I’m always surprised when I meet improvisers who have NEVER seen Two Man Movie, ever. If you’re one of those closet cases, please, open that door and get your arse over to the UCBeast, or the Pioneer Theater as they commonly refer to it. Legend has it, the Two Man Movie has been operating out of that space for quite some time now, before UCB took over in fact. Alas, I caught last night’s show and it was an instant classic, one of my all-time favorites to date.

Suggestion (always your favorite/least favorite song lyric — come prepared): You better call Tyrone.

Who doesn’t love a good blaxploitation flick? Ever see Shaft? I’m Gonna Git You Sucka? How about Black Dynamite? Well those are some pretty damn good examples. Last night Neil W. Casey and Anthony Atamanuik made one up and it was most excellent.

According to Wikipedia, these are the defining qualities of the genre:

When set in the Northeast or West Coast, blaxploitation films typically take place in ghettos and feature plotlines which entail crime, hit men, drug dealers, and pimps. Ethnic slurs against whites (e.g., “honky”), and antagonistic white characters such as corrupt cops, politicians, prostitutes, and gullible gangsters are common plot and or character elements.

Last night’s Two Man Movie, EVERY and i mean EVERY defining quality listed above was featured. There were crooked cops and politicians and there was a no BS taking, jive talking, kung fu knowing black cop/hero—Tyrone (obvie). An Irish cop respite with a drinking problem? Check. Prostitutes, pimps and super pimps? Double check. Drugs? Yes. Prominent black business men in the black community serving as drug fronts? Definitely. It was awesome.

No point in running through the entire set. Just imagine Neil and Anthony doing an ENTIRE blaxploitation flick complete with realistic dialogue, a great plot and good pace, solid acting and character resolutions, first rate special effects, fades and a killer soundtrack. What makes it special is they pimp each other SO hard but it’s funny. Also, I never get tired of watching Anthony justified the weird/unexpected moves…not sure what i’m talking about? Try finding reasons to fuck a cat to ingest drugs or explaining why you shit honey blood after ingesting them. Right. These guys are wizards and I heart them.

If you’ve never seen the Two Man Movie, you’re not right…like in the head. Check them out every Wednesday night at UCB East. Click here for reservations.